Thursday, May 26, 2011

please do not interpret

by J J Cohen

I had a strange dream last night. Perhaps it was caused by the fact that I've more on my plate right now than a small legion of superannuated scholars could accomplish in a decade, let alone the single month this lone superannuated scholar possesses to finish three essays and an abecedarium, draft a keynote lecture and compose the abstract of a second, and send a special issue of a journal off to press. Or perhaps it was the Dark and Stormies I drank with Steve Mentz last night during our wide ranging conversation about ecocriticism, family, job satisfaction, grad students we know, colleagues, beloved cities, life during a PhD program, recovery from that life, and many other things.

Anyway, last night I dreamt that I was in a theater seating 250 children and adults. For reasons I never questioned, I was in charge of mounting a puppet show featuring Kermit the Frog. I knew that I was supposed to keep the little sticks that move him invisible; not let anyone see that my hand was in his, um, well you know; and ensure that the audience was entertained. I quickly realized that the only trick in my arsenal was to run with Kermit along a low wall, making his feet go up and down as if he were riding a bicycle. That was all I could do, and after the third repetition the cheers of the crowd turned to restless annoyance. Yet I gave the amphibian-on-an-invisble-bike routine two more tries. As the boos erupted I woke up. I cursed Jim Henson, my stupid brain for generating such a stupid dream, and frogs in general, then tried to get back to sleep.

10 comments:

  1. No interpretation, of course, but a link to frog populations as ecocystemic indicators of health, or not.

    http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/10/081016124252.htm

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  2. It is difficult for me to feel sorry for these vanishing frogs, Steve. They bring that doom upon themselves with their infiltration of dreams. I know it isn't easy being green, but that doesn't mean it shouldn't be easy to obtain a good night's rest.

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  3. You talk about ecocriticism and then you have a dream about a character whose tag phrase is "It's not easy being green."

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  4. I've also worked in queer theory, and find my hand in this dream awkwardly placed.

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  5. Jeffrey, I love it that you know exactly how many children and adults were present.

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  6. Gerald of Wales12:27 PM

    Ignoring your pleas not to interpret I can only offer this: frogs usually prefigure the English conquest of medieval Ireland.

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  7. Worst Inception fan fiction ever.

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  8. James Mitchell1:15 PM

    Ecocretinism, if you ask me.

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  9. all i can say is a warning...careful cursing jim henson. the cosmos is listening. and so is a big albino lion puppet, and all of gonzo's people gone militant in their exile...

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  10. All you need to do is look to your previous post for an interpretation. :)

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